Lenten Social Media Fast

On Ash Wednesday night I was cruising my social media channels and noticed a St. Monica school friend said she was giving up Facebook for Lent. That instant I decided to take off all of my social media apps from my phone. "Are you sure you want to delete Facebook?" the phone asked. Um, yep. "Snapchat?" Uh huh. "Instagram?" Really. And "Twitter, are you sure even Twitter, Aunt Nellie?" Yep phone, even Twitter. I consider myself a social media junkie so this would seem to be a hard and fast, fast.  But by ridding myself of all of the temptations and distractions it was pretty easy. However, I couldn't give up Pinterest, because, let's face it, I have a problem.  I did check-in to FB once a week after the first few weeks to make sure no one was trying to reach me and low and behold, my own father used FB to communicate via direct message. But it really wasn't as hard as I thought. 

Full disclosure, I did Tweet during the #finalrose ceremony, because Ben. I loved this season of The Bachelor and Tweeting while watching TV is one of the most entertaining things ever. And this blog is connected to Twitter automatically so the posts were automatic. :)

What I learned during my Lenten social media fast:

• No one noticed I was gone. 

• No one emails anymore which means no one really ever writes real letters anymore.

• People hate talking on the phone. My mom especially. 

• I started blogging a little bit more.

• In general I had so much more time. 

• My phone never died during the day. 

• I didn't take pictures of food and I didn't care about taking photos of food. The immediacy of insta-everything makes the minute seem important. It's also basically free. I do love the church of paying attention. I do love a good roast chicken picture, but it just didn't matter. And I didn't miss it.

• I did not have fomo.

• After a two weeks on this fast I had no fear of missing out. Feeling disconnected hit hard week two. It was like a bad caffeine headache. During any fast you should pray when you are going through it. If I grabbed my phone I would say the Jesus prayer. Do I think social media is sinful? Not necessarily, but the distractions it was creating in my life certainly had sinful characteristics. I think sin is a separation from God. There were times on Instagram that I felt so connected to God and our glorious world through travel photos, flowers and general beauty but those moments were few and far between.

• My two week social media withdrawal was cured when I reached out in real life to friends I missed and needed to connect with for real. We wrote emails. Lots and lots of emails. I even got a real letter in the mail from one friend who I reconnected with via email. 

• We also met with people in person. See last post for Carla's birthday. That was a direct result of asking friends to do stuff in real life.

• Social Media is a lazy man's letter. I tried to connect via email to some of my most fun social media people and it failed miserably. A post is like a quick blanket blast that tells the world what you are up to, who you are supporting and made me realize how complacent I had become with the quick fix of posting just to make sure I was out there. Not for my job, but for my social media peeps. But again, no one noticed I was gone, so there was a part of me that felt free and lifted of the pressure to post at all.

@NelleSomerville

• Sharing on social media is like sex. The real brain crush was how addicted I had become to so many of these sites. Well, they are built to be addictive. Self disclosure was associated with the same pleasure as sex, food and money in this study. Well no wonder there are over 2 million articles about the addiction of social media just on Google. Brain crushing. Maybe that's why I enjoy blogging so much! Sharing is sexy.

• The universe sent me people I was supposed to be in contact with during this 6 week break. I kept running into people who I was "friends" with on social media, but who I hadn't seen in person for what felt like years. Thanks Universe.

• I was more attentive in meetings at work. I turned my phone to airplane mode more often during meetings and felt again, present. This article nailed it. Watch in your next meeting how many people are actively texting or reading emails. Is the meeting important if everyone is distracted? Now I'm seriously annoyed when I see someone texting or pull out there phone out in a meeting. The article associates the use of our cell phones in social and work situations as rude and obnoxious as smoking in public. Yikes. Watch at the next party or dinner you attend. Do people pull out their phones? If so are you engaging with your friends enough? Do you have interesting things to say? I think social media has mushed our brains a little bit. 

• I couldn't remember peoples names. I used Facebook as a crutch for memory. I ran into people I see once every 5 years and totally blanked on their names. I think that is fair, but still, I noticed it a lot.

• I read books and did check into our book club group to make sure I had the right books cued up. But then weeks later, I totally missed the reminder note about our meeting and retreat. My friend texted me knowing I wasn't checking FB so again, the important information got to me in time. Thanks Susan.

• I got rid of clutter in the house. This extra time off of my phone made me think about the things that were important in the house. We donated lots and lots of stuff in the last six weeks.

• I lost weight. All this not looking at food pictures every day made me only eat when I was hungry.

• I listened to Podcasts. Lots of them. I'll do a whole post on my favorites.

• I learned to ask people what was happening in the news. I haven't read The Four Hour Work Week, but at the cider tasting in the last blog post, our friend Kevin talked about the need for media fasts and to ask people what's happening in the news. I asked our neighbor Pam one afternoon and she told me about the pollution in Stoney Run. I didn't realize that Nancy Reagan had died until five days later. That meant I never turned on the radio or TV in five days. Pure, ignorant, blissful freedom.

• I fell in love with the liturgy again. I began going to Rite I, 8:00 am services, every Sunday. After talking to my dad about it, he said he thought he would miss the music too much. For Lent, no music was okay and a perfect way to get spiritual nourishment. 

• I found an adult forum studying the Bible, at an Episcopal church! There was time in my life to give back to God. I learned I just needed to wake up earlier to do so.

Sending lots of prayers for times of quiet and attentiveness this Holy Week. 

Anna Frances: third verse, same as the first

We had the nicest weekend in Washington, DC. Saturday night we said goodbye to the rectory under Stuart and Fran's (she's behind Marge in this photo!) care, for a kid blow out party. Alison and Stu threw a fun party and I played my first game of Beer Pong. I kind of wanted to break into the auditorium and break dance. Sunday, we lucked out and hit two birds with one stone for Stinger's little sister's baptism. Anna Frances was a pro! She smiled the whole time.

Marge's bestie from childhood is Frannie's godmother and it was so fun seeing her little girls in their southern  bows and lace. I loved getting to know Elizabeth when we were bridesmaids in Mary Margaret and Scott's wedding. Follow her fantastic shop on Instagram here. She has the best taste. We giggled how "close" we feel that we get to spy on each other on Insta. It's weird, but I love it.

The big girls taught Hastings how to be Marilyn Monroe. How cute is her facial expression? I swear I'm so in love with this kid.

I loved being here for one of Stuart's last baptisms at Christ Church. I cried of course, while Anna Frances just looked in awe at the candle and tried to touch Stuarts face. It was absolutely perfect. Psalm 139 is such a good reminder of how we were knit in our mother's womb by God. That He cares about the tiniest details in our lives. Don't ever forget that little child of God. You are precious and marked as Christ's own in baptism forever.

Godparents and parents with Stuart and little Frannie.

Elizabeth and Chris' family with the Plums. Godsisters. I took a million other photos but will let them use the best one for a Christmas card, perhaps.

I love the baptism window at Christ Church. I also love that we have made it to each and documented all of the girls baptism's here and here on this blog. As Marge said, "Same song, third verse."

Couldn't you just eat Fru Fru and Woodie up with forks? They were the sweetest girls too. This is the place where you take photos to show how much you've grown if you grow up at CCGT. I just love it the most. 

The buffet was simple and perfect. I brought Kinderhook Cheese Stamps for Marge's Daddy. They are a Baltimore staple but are now being sold in Dupont Circle. I see the Kinderhook babes at Union Graze often.

I found the neatest gift for Marge and the girl babies when I was in Seaside at the Central Square Records. See the little bag hanging on the radiator? It is has an image of Alice in Wonderland and the entire book is printed on the front and back, the words making up the image. They had lithographs prints as well as the bags with Moby Dick, The Jungle Book and more. Such a fun idea for art in a kids room. I also adored the women who manage that shop. Follow their feed here.

The details of her table were so beautiful and I'm obsessed with her china pattern. It was a much smaller gathering this year. Having three littles under three is stress enough I'm sure. So keeping it simple worked beautifully. It was so nice to get to talk to Scotty's dad and hug on his sweet Momma Kim too as always.

Two of my favorite girls in the whole wide world. Oh how I love this picture. Stinger looks so much like her daddy.

I gave her a fresh box of crayons as any fairy godmother should. Is there anything more simple and delightful? The weather was glorious so the kids hung out outside.

Already coloring in the lines at three years old. She's a genius I tell you.

There were precious crosses to decorate as well. I wrote "Stinger" on one side and Hastings said, "You know, that's not really my name." Haha! The honesty of a child.

After three of these baptisms we finally got a great shot together too.

It was great seeing Lynda as always. We shared Destin stories. Their families were just at Rosemary Beach two weeks before our trip! Next time I'm hoping we can all be down there at the same time.

Hernal loved the wrapping paper from the big girls.

Granddaddy George

Elizabeth's gift, which I need.

Woodie

Stinger being so, so patient waiting for her cake. "Playing" the tablecloth.

At different occasions on Sunday, Marge told me how good of a friend I am to her and how happy she was that we were there. Scott said the same thing to me and Eric. Isn't that what friendship is all about? To be loved, supported and reminded of how much we are loved. At that moment I felt their words as a reflection of God's love in my own heart. May sound cheesy or obvious but I was overjoyed by their words. How blessed and lucky we are to have such beloved friends. 

We love y'all with our whole hearts, truly. Praying you feel as loved as we did this past Sunday.

P.S. Uncle Charlie was with us, but I didn't bombard him with photos this time. 

Nesting Dolls

One of my resolutions at the beginning of the year was to use my hands more often in the name of art. I did finish Baby Nephew's teddy bear on the plane to Memphis in March. I checked one handsie-creative-thingy off the list. Inspired by a post from a friend on FaceBook after re-reading this article, "OMG, Twins! I had my second creative outlet idea. Nesting dolls for the most adorable friend and her precious family. Sam Bosma's nesting doll artwork was so awesome, I had to recreate it in my own way for her. "I will make you nesting dolls if it's the last thing I do," were my approximate words on her post. I even watched a short piece on Russian Nesting dolls during the Olympics to get motivated. But it was a totally blank slate and it took me forever to start. And another forever to finish. Do I paint them first, then draw? I ended up drawing first, then using colored pencils, sharpie pens and acrylic paint to finish. There are so many options but in the end I loved showing the wood.

Janelle is a book club friend. Read the article. She wrote it for the Baltimore Magazine. It's hilarious, well written and honest. I was one of her friends who was excited about twins! I was a nanny for two sets of twins with 5 kids total ALL UNDER 6 my freshman summer of college. Twins rock! Yes, they will never let you sleep at night, but during the day they actually keep each other company, are best pals, and the closest of secret keepers. Janelle documents her family in the most delightful way on Instagram @momoffour30. Follow her. The boys are want to sleep and jump in and out of each other's crib as of late. Hilarious from the reader's point of view, devastatingly annoying from the mommy and daddy's bedroom I'm sure.

Janelle always wears these shades. They are so her and this family photo is the perfect representation of their adorableness. Don't you want to be friends with them? We are so lucky! They are so cool, laid back and laugh at parenthood vs. bitch about it.

Stole Ron's whole look from this cool anniversary present Janelle found on Etsy.

I stalked their FaceBook pages to get ideas and draw their faces. Ron's is my favorite because it has the farm they visit on the back. It was just so fun to draw again! Why don't I do this more often. It's such a great outlet.

Wonder Willa with her princess dress and pink princess crown.

The twins were the Wild Things for Halloween and I just had to give and ode to Max and the Wild Thing to Zeke and Gideon. I love how the eyes turned out.

Milo is a little rock star with a guitar on the back. Janelle is the Editor of Baltimore Bride and the "Love" project was perfect for her doll. Now looking back through my orders I can't find the link to the actual place I bought them but Google nesting dolls, and find the number you want. This is pretty close. Very fun project for a rainy day with your actual kids too. We love you Diamonds!